Hello. It’s been awhile. My sabbatical, although purposeful, has held the constant ache of not journaling my thoughts in a public way in hopes of sharing some common thread with you, namely my blog. Anyone familiar with my writing style will define it as romantic, antiquated, insightful in some obscure sense. I also tend to write a great deal about the creation of God. Being raised on parables that Jesus told of gardening and weeds, and given practical instruction on such subjects from infancy, they became a part of my character. God still speaks to me in this way. I have a garden, my own figurative Garden Of Eden which will be defined in the next few paragraphs. I neglected my garden letting the weeds grow, and as described in Matthew 13:7, they began to choke out the wheat that makes up my bread of life. It is difficult for me to pen these words. I live in a social media age when posting the necessary yuckiness of life is not only unsightly, but also (even if not spoken aloud) indigestible, and thus inappropriate. Don’t show us the manure; only the flowers that grow from it!
I get a word for the year every new year. I’m only in my 2nd year of it, but intend to do it for the rest of my life, whether it remains practiced by the majority of the population or not. My word this year has been reassess. My immediate thoughts were reassessing my blog, budget, work situation, etc. And as is always the case, little did I know…hmmm. Shortly after I got my word I was driving to an appointment talking to God and telling him my frustrations. I heard in my spirit, “Tend your own garden.” I envisioned a community garden which I had a plot. While being oblivious to the lack of care I was showing my own garden, I was running around helping other people weed their own. My own garden suffered greatly even as I helped other people’s thrive.
I heard this warning but put off tending my garden for one more day. Soon the days accumulated to months and my garden became so overgrown I wanted to deny the existence of all the briers that had walled it in. The light was blocked, my plants couldn’t thrive, but if I didn’t look at it I could deny the fact that I caused it.
Who or what suffered? All the Lord had given me as blessings to tend to, especially me and my family. It was around this time that I began the #onemoreuse campaign on social media, getting a buzz from every like I received. Social media became my main source of validation. I replaced loving my family and myself with the abstract way social media and the few comments I recieved on my blog gave me a temporary high. I do not feel it is an overstatement to say I was sick and am still recovering. Thus if you’ve been missing me on Facebook or Instagram, this is why, plain and simple. I gave it up for a bit for the sake of my sanity and am only now slowly starting to reacquaint myself with both. I needed time to tend to my garden. My family and I are healing.
What does this mean to you? I don’t know. That is for you to find out. I can only remind you that it’s our responsibility to tend to our own gardens, manure and all! When they are fully taken care of, we can help others with theirs. Can you imagine Adam being so obsessed with a weed he saw in the dessert outside Eden, he neglected it, not working or keeping it as he was made to (Genesis 2:15)? Your purpose, no one else’s. My purpose, no one else’s. If it seems I am ignoring you, I ask for grace; I’m rediscovering my Garden of Eden.
One last thing: Because of my lack of social media posts, I ask you to share this blog on social media or with a friend, but only if it spoke to you, you feel it would benefit others, or it doesn’t take away from tending your own Garden of Eden. Cheers until the next time!